I’ve had to accept the fact recently that I’m not 100% atheist.

Imagine, if you will, a tranquil art piece: a beautiful woman gracefully posed, a child in her hands.

Got it? Now, let’s take it apart.

Right or wrong, dividing the two figures into separate entities makes this easy. We have the mother and her child. The mother– by virtue of simply having had the experience of growing something inside of her– will -always- be a mother and her creation will -always- be her child.

The child, however, by virtue of having human DNA and some sort of “spirit” or “life force” inject into it is his/her own person and over a span of time will grow and be quite and completely independent of his/her mother.

Thirty years in the future, that child will -still- be the child of the mother but also a -completely- independent organism at the same time— and that’s the kicker right there. How can it be -two- things at the same time?

Let’s take another example: death. My grandmother has approached and will now slowly pass 80 years old. If the average human lifespan is the indication of number of years her body will be capable of functioning and keeping itself alive, she’s on her proverbial “last leg.”

I’d also like to mention that the body was programmed to have a limited lifespan. If the DNA did not have the information to stop rebuilding the organism you could potetially life for a very, very long time. There is absolutely no reason why you couldn’t.

Putting ourself in her shoes for a moment, let’s imagine that we’re sleeping and our body just “gives out.” What happens at this point? What does the consciousness do? Does the brain realize it’s dead? Does the life force– upon disconnecting from a non-functioning human body– seek out another vessel? What is consciousness like without being attached to a human brain?

All of these are great questions with -great- answers. Only problem? My brain can’t compute them.

“Whoa, what’s that,” you say? “A limitation? I don’t think so.” Well, uh, yeah– I do think so. Try to get your old AT&T PC 6300 cranking out the graphics to Resident Evil 5. Try to get one of those room-size computers of the 60s to generate the calculations needed to do the special effects of the movie 300.

It can’t be done. It just can’t. be. done.

A limitation isn’t good or bad. It’s to be recognized and lived with. My limitation is the computational power of my brain.

Sure, my “spirit” or “life force” can [i]sense[/i] things, but it surely doesn’t help to compute or understand answers to questions I have. The questions are simple. The answers are too complicated.

So what does this mean? It means that– if I really live by my own belief system– I can no longer deny the existence of a higher power. I’m not going to call it “God,” a term that’s overused and misapplied, but I will call it a higher power until I have more information.

Which might not be until I upgrade my brain.

Another great example of the lack of my brain’s power to understand is the infinite (“eternal,” of you’re LDS) nature of things. My brain was wired to have a start and a stop. The physical world doesn’t work that way. Yes, things start and stop, but on that stop’s tails is a new start. Forever.


Time to stop this post and start work again.