Housewife Accidentally Discovers Diet Secret!

A housewife from Provo, Utah, discovers the secret to a bugger bust, smaller hips, and more shapely behind.

“I was so tired of all of all the dieting fads. I reasoned that life was simple and there had to be a simpler way, a way that nature intended. So I found it– by accident!” — Amy F., founder, CEO, and President of Ez-Fitlol, LLC.

And there is! Don’t be fooled by all of the diets out there that show you a picture of a slim person but can’t really back up their product with facts.

The Secret of the Secret

There is one, simple secret to dieting and you don’t need to subscribe to anyone’s idea of doing things. That secret is: your body knows!

Haven’t you ever noticed that sometimes your stomach gets bigger and you wish it went to your boobs? Or your arms got bigger and wished it would come off of your behind?

There’s a reason for that!

It’s not just WHAT you eat, it’s WHEN you eat.

It All Depends on the Cycle

As a woman, our bodies go through certain cycles (and I’m not just talking about menstruation). Where our body deposits fat depends on these cycles.

For example, when your body is gearing for pregnancy, it deposits fat all over. When you are ovulating, your body is depositing fat elsewhere.

So depending on what you eat and how much your body stores will determine the extent to how much weight you gain in a specific spot.

Now, break down the usual month-long cycle into a daily cycle. At certain times of day your body is processing and storing fat on specific parts of your body. Time those out right and you’ll increase your bra size by 30% and reduce your tummy size by 25%.

* The FDA has not endorsed these claims at all. But WTF do they know, they’re owned by the big pharmacaeuticals. Oops, did I write that?